Ma maladie invisible





Être bipolaire c’est ma maladie invisible. En me regardant, ça se peut que tu doutes même pas que mon cerveau est capable de me donner toute l’énergie du monde et, que deux semaines plus tard, j’ai de la misère à faire les choses que j’aime, à me lever et parfois même à fonctionner tout court.

Je me rappelle quand j’ai eue mon diagnostic, j’avais tout juste 23 ans, et je venais de faire un épisode de manie. Je me rappelle du médecin qui m’a dit calmement: Mlle Fortin, vous venez de faire un épisode de manie, vous êtes bipolaire.  

Dépressive majeure, trouble d’anxiété généralisé, ça je pouvais l’accepter, mais pas bipolaire. Mon monde s’est effondré. Je m’imaginais que la vie était une piste de course et que je commencerais toujours 100 mètres en arrière de tout le monde.

Aujourd’hui, 10 ans plus tard, j’accepte ma maladie. Elle ne me défini plus comme avant. Je suis une personne à part entière et être bipolaire, c’est tellement une petite partie de moi. 

Oui, je trouve ça difficile les hauts et les bas. Saviez-vous que même médicamenté, on ressent quand même ces différences d’énergie? Par exemple, aujourd’hui, je me suis levée et j’étais fatiguée, j’étais plus négative et j’ai même pleuré parce que je me sentais pas bien dans ma peau. Pourtant, la journée d’avant, j’étais super heureuse et j’étais pleine d’énergie…

J’ai décidé de recommencé mon blog, car je veux prouver à moi-même et aux autres qu’être bipolaire ce n’est pas tabou. Je souhaite raconter mon histoire. Je suis partie de loin et j’en suis fière. 

Vulnerability



So many of us are vulnerable. Even if society tells us that it’s important to be strong and feel empowered, being vulnerable is okay.

It’s okay not to have control over your emotions. Not to have control over events. It’s okay not to always feel composed.

I believe in embracing my emotions, even the ugly ones.

At the moment, I’m scared of getting my hours cut next summer. I’m scared of getting replaced.

Osheaga 2018




I’ve always wanted to go to a major musical festival and, this summer I did! I went to Osheaga which is, by a stretch, our Montreal version of Coachella. Ok, really by a stretch. But to give you an idea there were 45,000 attendees per day for three days.

And I was one of them.

My friend and I bought the tickets on a whim. We were on a terrasse, having a beer, and one of us said: “I’ve always wanted to go to Osheaga”. We both thought, well, why not?

The Scare of Underperforming



N.B.: This was written a week after my salary increase. I just never got around to posting it.

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As some of you may know, I got a salary increase. I did not ask for it. It was a merit-based increase. I was told that I went above and beyond my required tasks.

I was ecstatic.

However, right after the increase, I got scared. I was scared of underperforming. I was scared that I wasn’t good enough for my new position.

And... I started making stupid mistakes.

St-Jean 2018


St-Jean 2018. Just woah. It's hard to describe all the emotions that I went through in a single night.

La St-Jean-Baptiste or La Fête Nationale du Québec has always been an important part of my life. La St-Jean is a day to celebrate Québec’s French culture and language.


Two years I reconnected with my College friends that I hadn't seen for 9 years! We went to the show in downtown Montreal. The atmosphere was electric.

The year after, I spent the day with my boyfriend and one of my best friends at an attraction parc. Afterwards, we had a soirée/party among friends. I got a bit upset that year but... let's not talk about that.




This year was definitely the best. It might be the best in my life, to be honest.

It started out in a relaxed way sitting and waiting for the rain to stop under our umbrellas. As the evening progressed we went closer and closer to the center stage.

Bands that we liked started playing and we were right near the barriers. I think the only time I've been this close to performers was when I was working backstage for Freshmen Week in University.

However, it rained and rained and rained. This made the set up between bands even slower and the wait was long. I was looking forward to seeing Loco Locass. My all-time favourite Québécois band.